There’s Now a ‘Rick and Morty’ Porno

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Image: Hulu.com, Adult Swim

Is it any surprise the hugely popular sci-fi comedy Rick and Morty got a porn parody? The show just wrapped up its third season on Adult Swim and is now getting the XXX treatment, thanks to porn parody site Wood Rocket. Yes, the site which brought you such classics as SpongeKnob SquareNuts, Ten-Inch Mutant Ninja Turtles, and Strokémon, has now decided to make Dick and Morty.

The studio announced the project with an exciting new trailer and a pretty NSFW description: “When Morty Blows it again, Dick recruits ex-girlfriend Untitty to help him with his pickle,” the press release reads. “In the meantime, Beth eases the pain of her divorce with a little help from the genitals of Mr. Meesex and Birdperson.” As you’d expect, the trailer includes loads of sex puns and X-rated Rick and Morty cathphrases, such as such as “Pickle Dick,” “shlom-shlom,” “testicle-made Szechuan Sauce.” Out of this X-rated world!

Looking for the XXX treatment? We’ve got just the thing for your pickle here at NiteFlirt!

Check out more about Dick and Morty: https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/a3kbn4/of-course-theres-a-rick-and-morty-porn-now-vgtrn

Larry Flynt Offers $10 Million For Incriminating Sex Videos Of Trump

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trump statuePorn kingpin Larry Flynt is upping the ante on his original offer to get dirt on Trump. During last year’s presidential campaign, Flynt dangled $1 million to anyone who could turn over video or audio capturing Trump behaving in an illegal or sexually demeaning manner. Now, he’s raising the sum to $10 million, which he detailed in a full-page ad in the Sunday edition of the Washington Post.

The infamous porn publisher hopes that any incriminating information might lead to Trump’s impeachment and removal from office. While Flynt would settle for another “Access Hollywood” type video, it’s safe to assume that what he really wants is evidence of Trump’s “private dossier,” which allegedly involves water sports and other scandalous sex acts with Russian prostitutes. In Sunday’s ad, Flynt asks for any “smoking gun” that is fit to publish and drive Trump from office—but what he really means is “peeing gun.”

Looking for something scandalous? Come check out NiteFlirt’s private dossier!

Here’s more about Larry Flynt’s $10 million offer for incriminating info on Trump: https://www.cnbc.com/2017/10/15/larry-flynt-offers-10-million-for-dirt-that-could-get-donald-trump-impeached.html

7 Sex Horror Stories That Will Make You Say ‘OMG, Are They Okay?’

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wtf-1780728_640BuzzFeed recently asked readers to share the most hilarious, horrific, and weird things that ever happened during an orgasm. And boy did they deliver! These hilarious sex horror stories will make you say “OMG” at the ridiculously unfortunate timing.

  1. Accidental threesome
    “One night, we were in missionary position with her legs up on my shoulders. Just as we were both in the throes of orgasm, her dog, who had apparently snuck up on the bed, jammed his cold little nose right up between my cheeks as I was finishing.” Bad boy!
  2. TIIIIMBEER
    “After a particularly intense session with my fiancé, I hopped off the bed to clean myself up and collapsed onto the floor. My legs were still shaky and not cooperating. He’s laughing, I’m laughing — then I pee myself.” Intense!
  3. Unexpected reaction
    “My boyfriend was going down on me for the first time and instead of having an orgasm, I had a full-blown panic attack. He had no idea what was going on and thought I was enjoying it, until I kicked him in the head.” When losing complete control goes wrong…
  4. Pleasure-pain
    “One time I had a VERY intense orgasm while using my vibrator, and ended up kneeing myself in the face which resulted in a very messy bloody nose. Still no regrets though.” I hope they teach kickboxing!
  5. The worst intruder
    “My girlfriend at the time was giving me a BJ. My dad opened the door and ended up staring me right in the eyes as I finished. Horrifying.” Just. The. Worst. Thing. Ever.
  6. After-O surprise
    “When my boyfriend and I were still in the early months of dating, we were doing it missionary style. Right after he came, he let out a huge fart.” Is it a compliment, like belching after a good meal?
  7. So good it makes you break into song
    “My then-boyfriend (current fiancé) made me orgasm so hard I started crying and singing “The Circle of Life” from Lion King. Still don’t know why a kid’s movie came to mind.” That was one powerful orgasm!

Looking for a very memorable experience? Come lose all control right here at NiteFlirt!

Check out more sex horror stories: https://www.buzzfeed.com/annaborges/orgasm-horror-stories

People Who Have ‘Friends With Benefits’ Report Being Sexually Satisfied

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adult-1822413_640A new survey of 1,000 Americans and Europeans gives surprising new insights into “friends with benefits” arrangements. As it turns out, women are more likely to have FWBs than men. Not only that, but people who have them are pretty satisfied with their sex lives—in fact, they’re more satisfied than people in relationships.

“51% of Americans in FWB arrangements said they were satisfied, 30% said they were only somewhat satisfied, and 19% said that they were dissatisfied,” reports Refinery29. In comparison, people in relationships rate their sexual satisfaction somewhat lower: 43% of Americans said they were satisfied, 26% were somewhat satisfied, and 31% were dissatisfied. Researchers of the study aren’t necessarily saying that FWBs is superior to relationships, but the survey does prove that casual sex can work very well for some people.

Looking for some no-strings-attached fun? At NiteFlirt, we’re all about keeping it casual!

Check out more about the study that shows people who have friends with benefits are sexually satisfied: https://www.refinery29.com/2017/11/179254/friends-with-benefits-statistics

Sex Toy Pop-Up Wants Women To Try Out Vibrators On The Street

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Flickr.com: torbakhopperAn NYC pop-up had a very titillating offer for women—an “orgasm makeover.” British brand Hot Octopuss put out a press release about its “masturbation pop-up,” which many thought was just a dirty joke. But when public booths called The Changing Room started going up around the city, everyone realized it was actually real.

Hot Octopuss previously set up booths for men to “relieve stress” during work hours, so now they’re focusing on women’s needs. The masturbation pop-up offers women tips from an “orgasm stylist,” and even lets them try out a fancy $150 vibrator called the Queen Bee in a private room. “The room will feature music, chosen by members of the Octopuss’ social network,” they say. Now that’s a good public service!

Looking for some hot tips? We can cover all your needs at NiteFlirt!

Check out more about NYC’s masturbation pop-up for women: https://pagesix.com/2017/08/03/sex-toy-company-wants-women-to-try-out-150-vibrators-on-the-street/

7 Tweets Only People Who Have Licked A Butthole Will Understand

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accidentally-dirty-photos-11There are two types of people: those who eat ass and those who don’t. And if you do, you’ll find these tweets about rimming to be very relatable—and also hilarious. Here’s the best thoughts on tossing salad in 140-characters or less.

  1. “‘Omg McDonald’s is disgusting don’t you know what they make their chicken out of??’ Ma’am I’ve literally put my tongue in an asshole before.”Mmmm, finger-lickin’ good!
  2. “The president of 2045 is probably on Twitter right now tweeting about eating ass. Our country is in good hands.” Agreed!
  3. “I eat ass so I can safely confirm this tweet: ‘Eating cake is way more fun when it jiggles.’” Tasty and true!
  4. “I really can’t imagine this generation as old ppl. 80 year olds reminiscing about trap music and eating ass.” Ah, yes—the best generation!
  5. “Tell a guy you wanna go eat at a vegan restaurant and they acting disgusted like they don’t eat ass for a late night snack.” Personal preferences…to each their own!
  6. “When you try to eat a light dinner because you need to save room for all the ass you’re going to eat later.” Gotta save room for dessert!
  7. “His momma: ‘My baby sure can eat!’Me: mmmhmm.” Your momma raised you well!

Feeling hungry? Come whet your appetite right here at NiteFlirt!

Check out more hilarious tweets about eating ass: https://www.buzzfeed.com/spenceralthouse/no-booty-flakes-for-me

Principal Who Has Sex Dungeon In Office Gets Busted

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4707352284_1e4de7d166_zA very naughty British principal got busted for ripping off tens of thousands of dollars from his school to keep a secret sex lair inside his office. At his sentencing, the court learned of an impressive array of sex toys and games stocked in a custom-built “dungeon,” which he paid for using school funds. Witnesses said they would hear suspicious noises coming from his office, including “rhythmic moaning and banging.”

One witness said he heard the principal chasing his mistress around the office to “Benny Hill Show-like music,” the Daily Mail reported. Police found a secret sex stash, including several vibrators, sex games and pillows, watermelon lube, condoms, and even a large packet of penis straws and coasters with scenes from the Karma Sutra on them. The principal owes the school $162,000 in money he stole for his dungeon, fancy hotels, electronics, and car insurance, and has been sentenced to four years in prison.

Looking for something naughty? Come check out NiteFlirt’s sexy lair!

Here’s more about the principal who got busted for his office sex dungeon: https://nypost.com/2017/10/07/principal-who-had-sex-dungeon-in-office-gets-prison/

BDSM Is Just Like Golf, Study Says

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feet-1095408_1280What does golf and BDSM have in common? A lot more than you might realize, actually. According to a new study, BDSM should be treated just like any other “leisure activity.” In fact, the study was so convincing that BDSM has been reclassified along leisure activities in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.

Experts say that since BDSM helps participants develop personal skills, create a sense of adventure and reduce stress, it’s not different than sports like golf, hiking and skiing. If it weren’t similar to such leisure activities, they argue, it wouldn’t include words like “play” and “games.” The study, led by Idaho State University, states: “A few recent studies have suggested that BDSM participation might provide important psychological and social benefits, such as feelings of pleasure or enjoyment, fun, an escape from the demands of everyday life, personal growth, improved relationships and self-expression.” BDSM—ahem, golf—anyone?

Looking for a fun “leisure activity”? We’ve got just what you’re looking for here at NiteFlirt!

Check out more about the study that shows BDSM is no different than golf: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-4979518/Sociologists-claim-bondage-just-like-playing-golf.html

These Strangers Got Busted For Having Oral Sex On A Flight

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2900305586_530cf11668_oTwo strangers are paying the price for joining the Mile High Club. They definitely made their flight from Los Angeles to Detroit a lot more exciting—but then they got caught in the act. A 48-year-old woman was busted performing oral sex on a 28-year-old man, and now, they could both be charged with a misdemeanor or felony.

The in-flight adventure took place right in their seats, which ended up being a huge mistake. Despite its risks, hooking up on a plane is a common fantasy that many people act out. According to a recent survey, of the 17% of people who have fooled around on a plane, only a quarter of them made it to the bathroom, while 80% did it while sitting in coach class. While the Mile High Club is a hot fantasy, getting caught comes with a pretty hefty membership fee.

Looking for some exciting entertainment? Come join NiteFlirt’s naughty club!

Check out more about the strangers who got caught having oral sex on a flight: https://www.refinery29.com/2017/11/179299/mile-high-club-felony-charges

7 Weird Sensations That Turn People On

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feet-1095408_1280There are some things that strangely just get you going. Whatever the reason, when you experience it, it instantly puts you in the mood. Here are some of the incredibly specific sensory experiences that real people admitted to getting turned on by.

  1. The sound of a heart beating
    “I literally want to fuck someone while a loud thumping heartbeat audio is playing in the background. I actually need to experience hearing heartbeats in order to orgasm.” Whatever vibe pattern turns you on!
  2. Feeling turbulence on an airplane
    “The vibrations from the turbulence feels amazing and so does the thrill from when the airplane is descending. It sounds crazy, but it’s a serious turn on for me.” Living dangerously can make a person want to get wild!
  3. Foot play
    “I really get in the mood when someone licks, bites, and sucks on my toes. Getting a pedicure literally turns me on and I won’t be able to stop thinking about having sex.” Foot fetish!
  4. Being tickled
    “It’s sort of like the overload of sensation you get right before you come.” Yup, there’s a fetish for that too!
  5. Ears being blown on
    “When someone blows into my ears, I immediately get horny. The sensation always sends tingles down my back and I can’t help but be in the mood.” Hot!
  6. Watching paint-mixing videos
    “The sounds and blending of the colors make me wet for a reason I don’t know how to explain.” Kinky!
  7. Feeling ears being cleaned with Q-tips
    “The relief that it brings me is an orgasmic experience and it actually makes me horny. I’ve masturbated after using a Q-tip many times.” It’s like a dildo—for your ears!

What turns you on? We can always tickle your fancy here at NiteFlirt!

Check out more strange sensory turn-ons: https://www.buzzfeed.com/shannonrosenberg/visual-and-auditory-things-that-turn-people-on